


I Gotta Feehily

by Joey_Westwife



Category: Westlife
Genre: Anal Sex, Awards Presentation, Begging, Confessions, Drunk Sex, Embarrassment, First Time Topping, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Gay Best Friend, M/M, Marriage breakdown, Morning After, Regret, Rimming, Taking Advantage, friend reunion, losing inhabitions, straight boy turns gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-25 22:39:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14987126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joey_Westwife/pseuds/Joey_Westwife
Summary: Shane and Mark are reunited after a year of Westlife's split at a local charity awards night. Single and ready to get drunk, Shane takes his friendship with Mark a lot further than ever before but it puts their relationship to the test in the morning regret of it all.Using prompt: The morning after their first ever night together, they feel awkward and shy and don't know what to say so they just smile at each other and cuddle and stuff until they can think of the next step.





	I Gotta Feehily

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ausfil](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ausfil/gifts).



“Here to present the award for young fundraiser of the year are two of Sligo’s biggest exports, our very own Shane Filan and Mark Feehily.” 

Arriving late, Mark straightened out his tuxedo jacket backstage after a long overdue reunion hug with his former band mate and school friend Shane Filan. Traffic had been murder. Getting to the venue for the local charity awards night should have been easy. He only lived 10 minutes away on the picturesque banks of Lough Gill but there’d been a catastrophic accident on the main junction causing tailbacks in every direction on this summer Friday evening in Sligo. Mark prided himself on punctuality and was gutted he’d missed the arrival media photo’s, rushing past the dwindling line of photographers outside, anxious to snap a picture of the boyband members together. It’d been a year since Westlife split and fans had been desperate to see the lead vocalists side by side again. He made a promise to seek them out after his duty for the night was fulfilled. 

Shane smiled widely at his tall friend, brushing away a few loose hairs from Mark’s broad shoulder; admiring his maintained boyband quiff, now with a dash of light brown highlights through the front strands, sprayed perfectly into place. He wiggled the boy’s silk dickie bow and nodded. Mark sighed and mouthed thank you with an embarrassed grin on his face and they stepped out to the small stage set up at the back of the hotel function suite to take the stand and present the award Shane was holding in his hand trying not to maul with his tiny finger prints. 

The reception they received was electric. Despite locals always treating the boys like everybody else, refusing to brand them superstar status, fans knew the pair would be in attendance and their anticipation flooded the room into a barrel of joyous screams and applause. They took it as a compliment. A homecoming perhaps for their 14 years dominating the charts and putting Sligo on the map. They still looked every bit the part wearing trademark black suits, Shane with a satin tie over his crisp white shirt, tucked into his shiny waistcoat as Mark looked dashing in his EJ tux. Gorgeous. Fit for a wedding as always. 

Round tables were situated throughout the venue with some familiar Irish faces and local top dogs amongst the amazing award winners and fundraisers, inspirational stories in every corner. As extra, Shane had suggested they stand for photos with guests for a donation fee to Niamh’s Next Step, a charity close to Shane’s heart. Normally he wouldn’t be so cheeky as to charge anyone for a selfie but he wanted to do his bit and refused the fee to appear at the awards show, donating it to another good cause in the community. Mark did the same. 

It’d been a long week. Shane had been organising a horse riding gala for the next day with his brother Liam and in the angst of the preparation the country boy had failed to take a breather with little time to fart, crack one out in the shower or tease fans with a badly taken selfie for social media. He never had been vain, not like Nicky who often liked to take photos of himself in the mirror while wearing sunglasses. Pillock!

Trying to remain dignified throughout the presentation, the boys sipped on the complimentary table wine and clapped on cue, tearing up now and again at the emotional stories given to the guests through speeches and videos on the large screen.  
All Shane wanted was a nice cold pint of Guinness. Roll on the party. 

“Last time I saw you cry we were at Croke Park.” Mark leaned to Shane’s ear so their table guests didn’t hear and laugh. He received an elbow nudge and chuckle in return as Shane discretely brushed a tear from his eye. “It’s cute.” He grinned against a demanding shush and eye roll from his shy friend.   
Mark was always a tough nut to crack when it came to crying in public. He’d held it together best at their farewell gig but as soon as he got to his hotel room to change for the after party he’d bawled his eyes out for 20 minutes but hadn’t admitted to it. 

It took 90 minutes for the awards to be given out and another 30 for the boys to pose for photos. Shane’s hands were itching for a beer so at the first opportunity he got a round in and passed Mark a double JD and coke as he sat back down at their half empty table as the disco started. The younger of the winners and representatives made their way home leaving the adults to play and Shane could finally breathe a sigh of relief as the cold, dark liquid trickled down his throat, his eyes rolling to the back of his head in delight as he relaxed. 

“What a week!” 

“Keeping busy?” Mark smiled, giving his band mate his undivided attention. 

“Aye. Horse stuff. Can’t remember the last time I sang a song. My brain thinks my throats been cut.” 

“Now that would be a bad week.” Mark sniggered. “How are things since the breakup?”

“Not great. Kian won’t even talk to me. He said it’s my fault Gill’s such a mess.” He sighed with a shrug. “It was one mistake Mark. I thought we were solid.”

“Everyone did... What did you even do?”

“Don’t wanna talk about it mate. It’s taken 3 months to try and accept it’s over... Nicky messaged me last week but I didn’t reply. Wasn’t sure how to tell him.”

“He doesn’t know you split up?” Mark asked, surprised considering the boys had always been so close. “Why?”

“It’s complicated. How’s your love life? Heard from Kevin recently?”

“Nope.” Mark took a gulp from his glass and left it at that. It’d taken him much more than 3 months to get over losing his fiancé and he wasn’t about to dwell on it again. “Wanna get plastered and pull tonight though. Is that inappropriate at a place like this?”

Shane laughed and shook his head at him. “I’ll go home with ye.” He winked making Mark blush. “Be good to catch up and chill before the gala tomorrow.”

“You’re on batman.”  
**

 

“... I feel stressed out, I wanna let it go, let’s go way out spaced out, losing all control.” Mark belted, waving this arm above his head on the dancefloor to the classic tour cover. 

“Fill up my cup, Mazel tov.” Shane joined in, side stepping and bouncing by Mark’s side. “Look at him dancing.” He laughed, pointing at his drunk friend, never this enthusiastic on stage. Probably just embarrassing himself now. He slipped his hand under Mark’s jacket and flicked his wrist to open the breast panel. “Let’s take it off!” 

Mark’s surprised expression made him burst out laughing. He always covered up and Shane’s suggestion that he stripped off was new. The smaller drunk boy was flirting. No he couldn’t be, this was just Shane having a laugh and loosening up after a hard week in the real world. 

Noticing his gorgeous open smile and the twinkle in his eye, Shane giggled and flung his arms around the taller boy’s neck. “God I haven’t had this much fun in months.”

“Um... Yeah.” Mark looked around to make sure no one was snapping crafty photos of the Westlife front man draped over the openly gay one. “Good.” 

“Fucking love this song.” Shane shouted over the music as he raved against Mark’s belly. 

“Language! Calm down yeah?” his eyes flickered, feeling more and more anxious by the second. He stepped back and made his way back to his seat away from prying eyes and covered his mouth to hide the adoring smile on his lips. 

“Hey, loser.” Shane chased him, plonking his arse back on the seat to catch his breath. “What’s up with you?”

“Nothing.” He tried to give a convincing grin and luckily for him it was accepted. “Fancy taking this back to mine then?”

Shane clapped and sprung back to life, smiling ear to ear. He slapped his hands on Mark’s thighs a little too hard causing his friend to wince at the sting and jumped to his feet. “Totally, come on let’s go. I’m fucked.”

“You’re gonna be!” Mark wittered under his breath as he stood to leave with a hopeful smirk on his face.   
**

 

It’d been a long time since Shane stepped foot into Mark’s cottage by the Lough. He’d since decorated and it looked much more luxurious on the inside than it did the outside. He failed to ask but wondered what the sculpture was meant to be at the top of the driveway as the cab dropped them off. Looked like a Tim Burton inspired creature made from dead bark. 

“Got a new bar?”

“No but there’s new bottles in it. Help yourself piss head, I’ve missed our drunken after parties.”

Mark watched as Shane threw his dinner jacket on the back of the sofa, rubbed his hands and crouched down behind the mini bar in search for some spirits. Not that he needed them. He was much more of a lightweight these days since the band split and there wasn’t a 4 month tour to celebrate every night. The younger boy stared at his little friend full of life and happiness, a stark contrast to the troubled soul he’d been towards the end of their reign, suffering marriage issues and the fight to decide whether a solo career was best for his family. He’d been there for his best friend through thick and thin over the years, dried his tears in school when he felt he’d not given his best performance in drama class, stuck up for him when he got teased for winning rosettes at gymkhanas instead of spending time kicking a football down the park and encouraged him to be honest about his relationship with Gillian whether it disappointed fans or not. Seeing the talented boy smiling and laughing made his heart melt. He’d always been happy in interviews, fooling around with Nicky and he missed hearing his laugh. 

“Sambuca bitch, get in.” Shane beamed, trying to pour them both shots but spilling more on the counter and floor than in the glass. “Mazel tov!” he laughed. “Want some?”

“Definitely want some.” He nodded but he wasn’t referring to the Sambuca. 

“Had a great night Marky. We should do it more often. I miss you.” He wrapped his arms around Mark’s cuddle belly and nuzzled his nose into his chest, desperate for a hug to take him away from reality. 

“Yeah... Miss you too Shane.” Mark held Shane’s smaller frame, stroking his fingers down the back of his soft brown hair and kissed his crown. 

“You’re such a good friend. So kind and compassionate... Strong and...” Shane lifted his head and looked up at his best friend smiling down at his intoxicated state. “Sexy.” 

Shane’s hazel orbs sparkled in a way Mark had never seen before. Honest and lustful. A deep, dark pool of invitation to read into his comment as he gazed at the ocean of blue iris glaring back at him, lids flickering with uncertainty, wracked with nerves as the younger boy’s mouth filled with saliva. 

“Um... OK.” Mark’s voiced crackled as he sucked back the drool about to dribble down his chin. “Sexy?”

“So sexy.” Shane repeated, reaching his hand up to Mark’s neck to draw him down into an unexpected kiss. “So fucking sexy.” He bit his bottom lip as he stretched his head closer to Mark’s soft, succulent, inviting pout and pressed his own firmly upon them. 

“Mmm, Shane?” His eyes still closed as he let the sensation of Shane’s talented mouth linger in his mind, his lips tingling and blood rushing to his groin. “Fuck.”

“Wow man.” 

Clearing his throat, Mark tightened his lips to make a popping sound as he stifled a grin and arched his eyebrow. “Well you’ve never done that before. It’s usually Kian or Nicky doing the kissing.”

“My turn is well overdue then.” He whispered, pulling his head down again to engage in the first of what became an alcohol fuelled festival of man snogging; Mark too drunk to resist the temptation of taking advantage. 

Both of Shane’s hands now firmly around his head and neck, holding the taller boy in place as his tongue swirled a frantic wash against the whiskey tainted walls of Mark’s mouth, he pushed his body into him causing him to fall against the back of the couch, bashing his squishy butt cheeks as he took hold of Shane’s waist. 

“Oh god...” Mark muttered, throwing his head back as Shane eventually trailed kisses across his clean shaven jaw, round to his neck and nibbled on his ear lobe. “What’s happening?” he purred at the feel of Shane’s kitten kisses but he didn’t get an immediate answer as Shane unclipped his bowtie, tossed it to the sofa and proceeded to unbutton Mark’s shirt from the neck down. “Shane.”

“Sshh... Take me to your room.”

“I, um... What?!” he softly placed his palms on Shane’s cheeks and pulled him away to look him in the eye. “You’re wrecked.”

“I will be.” He winked with a smile and led Mark hand in hand towards his bedroom knowing full well where it was. 

How is this happening?! A lifetime of friendship spanning 3 decades, over 14 years in a band traveling the world, a year of freedom and still... Never this. Mark admitted he’d fancied Shane in school but it wasn’t said until he’d come out the closet years later and most people believed he pined for Nicky. But when had he ever been truly alone and drunk with Shane really? He couldn’t remember a single time they’d been in this situation and began to wonder if Shane had always hoped it would happen too, taking the opportunity with both hands no matter how leathered he was. If it was to be a mistake, would it matter as such? They hadn’t exactly been spending much time together since the split, they could easily avoid each other even if Sligo was a small place. He knew it was wrong and a risk but it was worth taking. It was Shane. Who didn’t want to shag Shane Filan given half the chance?   
**

 

There wasn’t many times Shane had seen Mark topless so he revelled in the bliss of tearing his shirt from his shoulders, running his little hands over the hairs and nipples of the boy so many girls wanted to bite. They kept the light off but the bedroom door was left wide open allowing the hallway to let in enough to cast a shadow over their stripped bodies. Just the suit trousers to go, Shane’s hard-on already poking at the zip to breathe, Mark did the honours of leading the movement, climbing over the smaller man as he pushed him down on the bed. 

“Someone’s been going to the gym.” Mark observed the growing pecs and contours of Shane’s slightly stubbled chest. Prickly where it grew back after a recent wax.

“Sexual frustration... Gotta burn the cals somehow.” He replied, arching his back so his groin met Mark’s. 

“Fit as fuck.” Mark began to kiss down Shane’s neck, grazing his bottom lip across his shoulder. “God I could eat you.”

“Do it Mark... Wanna feel you suck my cock. Wanna feel your tongue on my shaft and bell-end.” He moaned as Mark tentatively sucked his nipple. “Mmm, so sexy.”

“You’re telling me!” Before heading south, he placed another kiss on Shane’s lips, deliberately pushing his own erection up the boy’s crotch. “You’re fucking gorgeous.”

“Suck me Mark, I’m so hard for it right now.”

“With pleasure.”  
**

 

He wasn’t expecting this. Mark’s tongue licking his entrance was something he hadn’t even considered. Wasn’t sure how he felt about it now it was actually happening. Not even Gillian went near his arse. A fondle of balls during a blow job was as good as it got. Mark’s giant hand stroking his cock felt pretty good though as he laid back and gripped the duvet, one leg over Mark’s shoulder, the other out the way for access. 

“Let me fuck you Mark.”

“Are you serious?” his head popped up from between Shane’s perfect booty as his eyes widened with excitement. 

“Need to come inside you. Grab a condom, now!”

Mark didn’t want to have to argue the fact he needed loosening up first so he grabbed the lube and threw a packet on Shane’s chest to cover himself up. His head was spinning as the last shot tipped him over the edge, spurring him on and making him lose all control on reality. Shane climbed to his knees and took Mark’s weeping cock into his hand, smearing the pre-cum around the tip as he shot his tongue back into his mouth, shuffling across the bed to bend the taller boy over. He took the tube from his friends hand and squirted a generous amount on his finger tips, immediately placing his hand under Mark’s balls in search for his hole. 

“So much easier to find than a clit.” Shane chuckled, rubbing the gel deeper and harder into the crevice taking Mark by surprise. 

Biting his bottom lip as the coldness seeped inside he felt a finger subtly enter him. “Mmm, that’s nice. How do you wanna...”

Shane pushed on the back on Mark’s head, forcing him down on all fours as he shuffled behind him to open up his arse cheeks, guiding his hips in place as his own dick danced and pulsed. The second the tip was pushed into Mark’s puckering hole both boys let out a sigh of pleasure. Shane hadn’t felt anything this tight around his cock since he took Gillian’s virginity and Mark hadn’t been fucked since Kevin left so feeling Shane’s girth enter him was a shock to the system.   
It was slow at first, gathering speed as Shane massaged his plush bum, ignoring the fact it was much hairier than his wife’s. He didn’t mind too much, he couldn’t see much with the light behind his back anyway. Just knew it felt incredible thrusting his deprived weapon into someone so warm and curvy. It made him feel smaller to be behind a man of Mark’s stature but fuck it was good; every slide deeper and harder than the last. 

“Fuck Shane that’s good.” He winced as his prostrate was stroked by Shane’s rubbery tip. “Harder.” He demanded, reaching down to wank himself off while his friend concentrated on not going dizzy on him, his finger nails digging into his love handles now. He wanted this to last forever, wasn’t even bothered if he couldn’t return the favour just never wanted this magical feeling to go away. Shooting stars flying through the darkness of his closed eyes, an infinity of space flashing by on an out of body journey to another universe. Every thrust boosting his ship faster towards an explosion.   
**

 

Mark squinted as the morning sun shone through the open curtains onto his face. Flat on his front atop the duvet, it stuck to his tummy like glue, he took a deep breath through his nose and crunched his forehead at the first signs of a hangover. When he heard the soft snuffles of someone on the bed beside him his eyes widened and he froze. 

Oh. Shit. The. Bed. 

“Fuck!” he sighed, peering over his shoulder at Shane drooling on his pillow. His morning glory standing to attention covered in the dregs of crust from last night’s cum-fest. “Bollocks.”

“Morning.” Shane croaked with a smirk, wiping his face over the pillow before opening his eyes to see the horror on Mark’s face. “Oh... Sorry.” He reached the sheet over to cover up and blushed at the hazy memories of the night before. 

“What the fuck did we do?!” Mark covered his face and eventually let out a cheeky giggle as Shane curled the duvet, smiling at him. 

“Ha-ha, yeah, um... Hmm. Totally pissed.”

Raising his eye brows to insinuate an understatement, the brunette let out another sigh. “You think?”

“Wasn’t so bad was it?” Shane worried. “It was just sex.”

“No it wasn’t. It was Shmark sex and that’s definitely never happened in any realm.”

“It was... Amazing though right?”

“Huh, Shane it was perfect. You’re perfect. I just...” Mark dropped his gaze and turned to face his best friend. “Never thought you and I would, ya know, go there.”

“You’ve never thought about it? Thought you used to fancy me.”

“I... Fucking hell.” He chuckled. The biggest shy smirk on his face. His cheeks glowing pink as blood rushed from his groin to his face. “I did... I, I do.”

“You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed Marky.” Shane reached to scruff up his bed head and laughed. When he caught the younger boy’s eye he felt a bashfulness of his own. “I was a bit hammered. I remember... Oh god. I let you...” he clenched his bum and knew. “Yep thought so. Ugh!” he buried his face back into the pillow and groaned. 

“Yeah, that!” Mark grinned, sitting up against the headboard, feeling slightly sick with guilt and nerves. “Shane... What we did...”

“Nope, don’t wanna hear it.”

“Mate... There has to be a reason it happened. This is us. You came onto me remember.”

“Hmm, don’t remind me. My head hurts... And my arse!” Shane rubbed his hands over his face, scrubbing some life into himself. “Shit... Sorry man.”

“I don’t really know what to say to be honest. Find it quite hilarious.”

“Fuck off mate, I’m not gay.”

“Pah, could have fooled me. You took it like a puff last night. Practically begged me to fuck you when you’d finished on me.”  
Shane punched Mark’s upper arm and snarled at him.   
“Ha-ha, come here you big idiot.” 

Mark shuffled closer to his now sober friend and pulled him in for a cuddle. Despite his immediate regret and embarrassment, Shane accepted and snuggled up to the big man’s warm torso, linking his fingers into his hand and resting it on Mark’s chest. 

“I’m sorry.” The older boy almost whispered, staring to the foot of the bed where Mark wiggled his toes. Always did that when he was nervous or anxious. “Don’t know what came over me. Guess it was just a rebound thing. I’m still married.”

“To a woman yeah. Where did it come from man? You’ve never insinuated you were interested before. If you were gonna shag anyone I’d have had my money on...”

“Do not say Nicky!” Shane cut him off sternly.

“Ha-ha, why? You were every girl’s wet dream. He’d have smashed your back doors in, in a heartbeat.”

“No thanks. I’ve heard about his shagging techniques. I much prefer an affectionate, soft... Meaningful experience.” He didn’t realise he’d done it but he squeezed Mark’s hand as he said it. 

“Right... I’m soft as shit then yeah?”

“No I didn’t mean... Huh. You’re the least judgemental person I know Mark. Don’t... I don’t fucking know, shut up.”

Mark sniggered and dropped a kiss to Shane’s crown. “It’s fine. Love you man.”

“Hmm... What if... Huh, doesn’t matter.” Nudging him to go on Mark asked him to talk if he needed to. “I can’t I’m embarrassed. Just had your cock up my arse. My cock up your arse... Don’t think I can think about it at the moment.”

“We can just forget it ever happened. Friends have drunken sex all the time. Doesn’t have to mean anything does it?”

“Straight friends maybe. Not married men with beautiful wives. Not straight boys begging their gay best friend to show them what the fuss is about.”

“You’d be surprised.” Mark grinned to himself. “This won’t... This ain’t gonna get weird is it?”

“Why, you planning a reunion already? Shnicky fans will be devastated.”

“Ha-ha, maybe they should be. If they knew the truth there’d be a new dynamic in interviews.”

“I don’t even know how I feel bout it let alone anyone else. I just fucked my best friend. He sucked my dick then I shoved it up his arse.”

Mark’s cheeks blushed again. Glad Shane couldn’t see the pride in his smug smile. “Felt pretty amazing to me... But maybe it doesn’t have to be a big deal. It’s not like we’re jeopardising our first album. No one will ever know. We’re mates like you said. It’ll get brushed under the carpet, it’ll be a bit awkward for a bit then it’ll be fine.”

“Right... Except...”

“Except what?” 

Shane looked to the beautiful morning stubble of Mark’s face, his tired eyes glistening in the sunlight. “You’re so beautiful in the morning. I never got to see that in the band.”

“Perks of having you’re own room.” He shyly smiled. “You’re so snuggly in the morning.” 

“Feel safe in your arms.” He stared at those lips again, licking his own as his morning hardness refused to go down. Tight and flaking dry semen. 

“Love holding you in them.” He murmured, unsure whether to go in for a kiss or not. “You’re really special Shane, I’d hate to lose you now.” 

“I don’t think that’s likely to happen.” Shane replied, pushing his stiffy into Mark’s side as he closed his eyes and stretched his neck to press their lips together. 

The sudden feeling that regret wasn’t going to ruin their friendship swept over Mark. A cold rush spreading over his limbs, slowly bubbling up to a fire in his belly. The urge to ram Shane’s ass again came as his semi turned hard. 

“Fuck Shane... What the hell are we gonna do?”  
**

 

After being encouraged to shower the sex away, Shane slipped back into his suit trousers and shirt, folding his jacket, tie and waistcoat neatly into a bag for life as Mark awkwardly sat on the bed twiddling his thumbs whilst snug in joggers and a hoody. He ran his hands through his messy hair and sighed. 

The morning kissing hadn’t amounted to anything. Mark wasn’t sure how he felt about having slept with Shane. It was so out of character and the blue that he convinced himself alcohol and anger were to blame for the older boy’s lapse is judgement. His marriage was over, seeking comfort in familiar arms and Mark believed because Shane was too polite to be honest sometimes that he just didn’t want to admit it was a monumental mistake and act of rebound confusion. Although Mark was more than willing to take advantage of the situation last night, now he blamed Shane for it and felt used. Two voices in his head were yapping and nipping at him, chipping away at his sanity as he one minute he imagined being in some fantasy fairy-tale with Shane as his prince and the next he was sad by the prospect of them never speaking again because they were so regretful and disturbed by the memory. 

Shane could see Mark’s brain ticking like a time bomb, ready to explode and paint the beautiful, burlesque bedroom in red silky blood. “Mark... We need to talk about this. I can see you beating yourself up already.”

He shrugged, avoiding eye contact but desperate to grab the boy in to roll on the bed for round two. “Don’t know what to say or think really. It happened and now I feel... Used I suppose.”

“Oh mate, come on it wasn’t like that. You’re not just a random one night stand. This meant a lot to me.” He sat on the edge of the bed and rested his hand on Mark’s knee but didn’t receive the same attention. “Why don’t you come over to the gala later? I’m sure everyone would love to see you. We can just hang out like old times. Times before the band when no one else’s opinion mattered. I’m still me, you’re still you... Gorgeous, wonderful you... And I couldn’t bear to lose you like I’ve pretty much lost Kian and almost Nico. I need you Mark. I love you so much man. You’ve been a staple of my life for most of it and whether last night is the making of us or just an extension of our friendship, I’ll never not want you by my side... I made a conscious decision last night to explore my sexuality and sorry if you think I used you for that but truth be told... You’re the only person I’ve ever imagined doing that with and ya know what? It was fucking perfect. You are perfect.” 

Mark forced a smile and turned his head to look at his friend close to tears, squeezing his warm thigh. “It was pretty hot. Doesn’t mean we’d have the courage to do it again. Wouldn’t it be weird?”

“Marky if it feels weird then it’s not meant to be. I have a ton of shit going on in my life right now so I need my best friend. If it feels right and it happens again then great. If not... We have a lifetime to continue making memories with our clothes on.”

“I know you’re right and it makes sense but... I don’t think you realise how incredibly sexy you are. Seeing the way Nicky was with you... I mean, shit that boy is hot too but he knows it and uses it to wind people up. Most of all me. Was never sure who I was more jealous of. You for getting all the attention or him for having the confidence to touch you whenever he felt like it.”

“He’s straight though. It was just a stupid bromance that got shrugged off. When you came out you were with Kevin. Once everyone knew you were gay they’d have made some serious allegations about myself or Nicky acting that way with you... But we’re not an active band anymore and we’re both single.”

“So what are you trying to say? I don’t get it Shane. You’re saying one thing but it sounds like you want another.”

Shane huffed and dropped his head to Mark’s shoulder. “I don’t know. All I do know is... Being with you wasn’t a mistake. It felt natural and... Truthfully I don’t want to leave this room thinking I might never get to feel that closeness and complete trust that I felt when you were in my arms. You’re so... I dunno, just... Can’t describe it. You’re a walking, talking teddy bear that makes everything seem beautiful, fluffy and dreamy. I feel safe and comfortable around you. I can be myself completely and I wasn’t nervous for a second when I told you to... Make love to me.”

Mark sniggered and shook his head as he licked his lips. “Sounds like you’ve fallen in love with me already.”

“Mark I’ve always loved you. That’s the point. I know you inside out already and now we’ve shared the only thing that branded us just friends, I don’t know how to step away from it. It was liberating. I’ve never come like that in my life and I... I think I want more... With you.”

“So after everything you’ve already said, now you’re saying you want more?”

Shane grinned and shrugged his shoulder. “Fuck it. I’d be insane not to. Kevin is a fucking idiot for leaving you. I could never do that to you.”

“You never have.” Mark cupped his hand around Shane’s ear and leaned down to kiss him. “That didn’t feel weird to me.”

“No it didn’t, did it?” he smiled making his cheeks hurt. The faith and excitement that something beautiful had begun was written all over his face. “Can’t believe it took us this long to realise. For me to realise.”

“Realise you’re gay?”

“For you yeah... Well now you have to come to the gala with me. I want you with me.”

“Might wanna keep it on the downlow for now though. If Gillian or Kian find out...”

“One day at a time, I promise.” 

“OK.” Mark smirked with a warm heart, beating so fast it deafened him. Shane wanted him. His best friend. His soul mate? “Love you Filan. Can’t wait to make love to you again.”

“Well what the fuck are you waiting for?” Shane jumped on top of his new fuck buddy, boyfriend or whatever he was going to brand it, planting an array of kisses all over his face, making the boy laugh. “Got half an hour before I need to leave.” He raised his eyebrows with a suggestive grin. “Fucking love you Feehily.”  
**


End file.
